How can you claim love somebody and intentionally hurt them? You can't simple and plain. For you to think that you can accidentally want to control someone you love is completely delusional. Control is what domestic violence is about. To obtain and maintain that control you'd use any means necessary, in particular, words, isolation, and the physical violence.
The Facts
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Abusers use a myriad of tactics to establish and maintain control over their partner. Physical violence is often the one that is most noticeable; it's used to intimidate and instill fear. Abusers may also utilize emotional and economic abuse as well as isolation to maintain control.
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The Children
Children are often the reluctant witness to domestic violence and even worse, the unwilling participants. Abusers often threaten to keep their children from the other parent or limit visitation as a way to keep their control. The children have no say in what they see when the abuse occurs and even if they cannot see it, they can hear it. They hear the screaming, sounds of blows being delivered, and dishes breaking. They hear the hole being punched into a wall and the cries for help, but sit there crying because they are powerless to do so.
The Signs
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Where To Get Help
First is the police, but if you are not comfortable with that, there are domestic violence hotlines you can call that are completely confidential such as:
- The National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233)
- Support In Abusive Family Emergencies (S.A.F.E) (1-706-379-3000)
- Safe Haven (1-800-334-2836)